btw I have a failboat sideblog @daily-failboat-clips
Anonymous asked:
AITA for trying to fix everything in the world?
I (2,006m) was imprisoned by my girlfriend (5f) two thousand years ago because she didn’t share my vision for the future. Now, I was awakened from my eternal slumber by a comet causing an earthquake that shook the enchanted bracelet off. I found the one other person I could commune with (5f), and convinced them to destroy my magic scroll, returning my magic powers back to me. I did lie to them, saying that my magic would be gone for good, but it was the best way to free myself. I made myself king of my tribe by giving out super powers, then went to the old city. I also cast a spell on an earring I made to make everyone like me. I want to win the war against the enemy tribe, and then enchant everyone in the world to get along and be happy. The problem is, my friend who I lied to in order to escape thinks I shouldn’t fight my enemy tribe, and all her friends think I’m a danger that must be stopped due to manipulating others’ free will. AITA?
jokes aside, I've come to like twitter. Out of all the big social media platforms, it's the one where the playing field between TRAs and the mentally stable has been leveled the most. Obviously it's not perfect, and it really is chaotic af.
G
eclipsedrawsthings asked:
AITA for making an entire class think their dorm was haunted?
I (15F) am a first-year student in the support course at my school. Recently a few girls from the hero course in my grade approached me and asked me to make them a baby to keep this little creep (15M) off their backs. I happily agreed—I love any opportunity to make new and exciting babies, and to hear them tell it the guy is an absolute menace who deserves whatever he gets.
Here’s where things got sticky.
The day I delivered it, one of their classmates (also 15M) told a really creepy ghost story to a group that included the creep, and because of it he thought a ghost was coming to kill him when he heard my baby doing its job. I normally wouldn’t care, except that nobody in their class could figure out the source of the noise and they eventually all got convinced they were being haunted. This culminated in an incident in the middle of the night that resulted in two teachers getting knocked out and the whole class getting assigned essays as punishment.
I don’t think this is my fault, but one of my senpais heard about it and she thinks I should apologize to those teachers if nothing else. I feel like I just did what I was asked to do, but I do feel kind of bad about the whole class getting punished, especially since I consider at least a couple of them my friends.
AITA?
*Mutual reblogs something you posted*
Me: They still like me. Thank God.
reblog this post to let the mutual you reblogged this from know that you still like them
this cannot fucking continue
wuat is wrong with a fat squiirrel dude she just knows where the nuts are
[Image Id: a Reddit post by u/cooltonsnook on subreddit r/fatsquirrelhate with a NSFW label. It is a photo of an unusually fat grey squirrel seemingly eating something /End Id]
YES I'M GAY:
faGgot
dykAe (the a is silent)
trannY
i may be stupid
you shut your whore mouth
i won’t hesitate bitch
I need UK journalists to not show 43 degrees is not beach weather like people are gonna die
Americans do not interact
Im Australian, and 43C is NOT beach weather. That is VERY hot, even for us, but for the UK its apocalyptic. At 43C you should not even be going outside if you can help it, treating it like beach weather is a one way ticket to heatstroke.
I agree with not going outside for long periods of time but you will have to plan something to reduce the heat within your households. Especially if your house is designed to retain heat
Fans pointed at open windows will pull out hot air and allow it to circulate - don't put them IN the window, leave some room by the side for extra air to get drawn in.
If you can't afford cold packs (and if you can, stock up on some NOW), get some ziplock bags and freeze them, with wet washcloths or ripped up towel inside. You want them to be ready in the freezer when you need them. Wrap them in a tea towel and put them on your wrists and ankles.
A big bowl of ice water in front of a fan will blow cold air into the room and make a massive difference. Again, if you don't have ice cube trays get some and freeze them *now*, don't wait until you're already in trouble (although I am melting at quarter past nine but my thermoregulation is bollocks so I don't know if that's the heat or just the me). If you can't afford to get any, clean out empty yoghurt pots or Tupperware or whatever you have that can hold water. Even if you end up with a giant ice cube from a lunchbox, it'll help.
Even just opening two windows at a crack will allow some air circulation - I sometimes prop open my bedroom door and leave the bathroom door open, both windows are locked at a crack because of the cats but it creates a nice little line of wind along the landing.
If you're someone who needs something on them to sleep, take your duvet out of the cover and just use the cover.
Remember that water acts as a lens - you do NOT want to wear a wet t shirt in the burning sun. I did this when I was 8 and if I tan on my back you can still see the scars.
Read the instructions for sunscreen carefully, and use the highest spf you can find. Reapply as per the instructions. If you get burned, Malibu do an amazing aloe-based spray on after sun, I got mine from Savers for 3 quid and it lasts ages. I keep it and any other after sun in the fridge, which means it's incredibly lovely to put on. Aloe is magic for burns so definitely gravitate towards that if you can. My son got badly burned (he's ginger, he went to an outdoor pool and they forgot to give him sunscreen) and he's had 2 helpings of it and you wouldn't believe how much better he is (he couldn't even really wear a shirt).
Make sure your pets have plenty of fresh cold water to drink, and if they usually have dry food consider giving them some wet food for one of their meals (cats are notoriously not always great drinkers but wet food will get them some liquid). Keep the curtains and/or blinds closed in south-facing rooms. I have blackout curtains in the front room and the front bedroom (my son's) and they make a MASSIVE difference to the heat. Make sure pets have access to these cooler spaces if you can create them.
Keep oven/hob use to a minimum if you can. I like making a massive pot of something that can be reheated in the microwave if necessary - the oven especially adds a lot of heat. Or get some wraps and ham and cheese and eat those.
Cordial or fruit juice can be better than water if you're sweating a lot. Cordial is cheap as chips. Salty snacks are also good.
Go to Iceland and buy a billion lolly ices. It's especially a good way to make sure kids stay hydrated.
I realize op asked for Americans not to interact, and whether or not they're being cheeky, I feel obligated to reblog this to save lives.
That temperature is absolutely murder, even moreso with humidity.
Please, be safe and stay hydrated!
For reference, 43 degrees celsius is roughly equivalent to 109.4 degrees fahrenheit. That’s bad.
This is nearly DOUBLE the typical average temperature of the UK. I don't care if you grew up in Satan's asshole, if you woke up one day and it was twice as hot as it usually is, you're gonna have a bad fucking time. The infrastructure is not built for 40+ degrees, and with the government doing... The thing it's doing, I doubt they're gonna even bother to help people, so people need to see things like this post to be able to help each other instead.
Heads up UK folks, we're looking at hitting 40°C again in about two weeks. Now's a great time to prepare however you can, figure out what you can do to make things more bearable
Putting a wet tea towel in the freezer for 20 minutes (in a freezer bag so it didn't stick to anything) then tying it to my wrists/ankles helped a lot last year, so I'll share this post in the run up in case it helps anyone else
Keep an eye out for people struggling, including yourself
If you've got a cold pack of some kind, the fastest way to cool down is to put those wherever arteries run close to the skin. Wrists and ankles are good, so is the back of your neck, the small of your back (along the spine), and the backs of your knees.
If you are opening windows, open one on the shaded side and one on the sunny side, if you have that option; it will give a cross breeze. If you can open one on the shaded side and one on the side not in direct sun, even better.
I live in San Antonio. 43° is fucking MURDER. 43° is when they open government building so people don't fucking die.
Stay safe. Drink water. Good luck.
hey non bugsnax fans what do you think is NOT a canon piece of info/event to bugsnax
one of the characters is divorsed and has a child who they're not allowed to see
brain damage indused flashback of two women kissing (and some other stuff)
you get gifted a part of a machine that was almost used for decapitation
the funny food bugs can kill you if you give in to hubris
"likes gossip, photography, and breaking and entering."
there's a sentient cactus that moves around the town and wants to kill
loser archivist who is also a part-time barista
guy makes out with best friend and lives with him, has no idea they're dating
an island is supposedly fertilised with bodies of sacrificed ancients
bugsnax fan (show results)
Make this break containment please i want. To See
Happy Disability Pride to all the wizards with disabilities!
For the month of July, all wizard crimes committed in the name of anti-ablism, or ablism-retaliation, fall under the “WRATH” act, and carry No penalty
another underappreciated tumblr feature that you dont get on other sites is the queue. i love it when something i thought was funny six months ago and then forgot about a week later crawlts its way out of the processing vortex and i get to see it all over again.
you should queue this post it would be funny and grant me immortality
you motherfuckers put me in the processing vortex